Chapter 1: Introduction to Personal Challenges

Welcome to my blog, “Welcome to the Wilderness,” where I document my journey through my comic project, Annex: Anima. This collection reflects my thoughts and progress.

“Stop hindering me,” I often say to my reflection.

What impedes my progress? The answer is clear: it’s me. My daily choices and behaviors often clash with my ambitions and dreams. It's a struggle to maintain a productive mindset when part of me believes, “This will be incredible,” while the other part insists, “This is unachievable.”

In recent weeks, I have delved deeply into what causes me to halt my creative flow. I have been analyzing my lack of productivity from various perspectives, confronting challenging questions, and taking time for self-care. Who am I as a creative individual? How can I identify as one if I struggle to produce?

I believe I’ve made some progress. By examining the significant obstacles I face, I’ve adopted a scientific approach, identifying key areas worthy of exploration. Currently, I’m testing what I consider the five barriers to goal achievement, which conveniently form the acronym D.E.A.T.H.

Curious, right? Let’s dive deeper!

D - Distraction

Distractions are the silent assassins of productivity. They lurk everywhere, often in subtle forms, diverting you from your goals or transforming into your new focus, away from what truly matters. From a pile of dirty dishes to a seemingly harmless 15-minute YouTube video, distractions can easily consume your time. (And let’s be honest, that 15-minute video can spiral into an unplanned binge that steals your whole evening.)

Here are some common distractions I encounter:

1. An overdue chore
2. A captivating video game or series
3. A friend or family member’s request (urgent or not)
4. Background noise that diverts your attention
5. Situations that trigger FOMO (fear of missing out)
6. Your smartphone

I know my work habits well, and I thrive in a flow state. I love getting into the zone and allowing my thoughts to guide my creativity. Distractions disrupt this flow, making it increasingly challenging to regain focus. Typically, distractions initiate the cycle; you choose to step away from your work. It’s essential to recognize that this is a drain on your energy. Allowing distractions to invade means more distractions will inevitably follow.

Proposed Solution:

To combat distractions, identify their sources and create strategies to stay focused. If entertainment is a problem, allocate specific time for those breaks. If relationships are a hindrance, set clear boundaries for when you’re unavailable. Creativity plays a vital role in crafting solutions, but the first step is recognizing your distractions.

E - Energy

I refer to it simply as “Energy.” This finite resource is what fuels our daily activities. Dr. Roy F. Baumeister, in his book “Willpower,” discusses how our “willpower” diminishes with tasks like chores, social obligations, and errands, while activities like sleep and laughter replenish it. Ultimately, running low on energy hampers our ability to accomplish tasks or risks overexertion.

Observing my peers, I notice patterns in their creativity, often tied to burnout. After completing a project they’re proud of, they tend to take extended breaks before starting anew. I experience this as well; significant exertion requires a period of rest to recuperate. If I’m running low on energy, I can’t perform at my best.

However, I feel like my “willpower” has diminished over time. I once could create art effortlessly without feeling drained. I want that energy back!

Proposed Solution:

I’m learning to treat my energy like a muscle that can be strengthened. I believe in the concept of “willpower,” but prefer the term “energy” to align with my thinking. Acknowledging my limitations has alleviated the fear of not accomplishing enough in a single day. Strengthening my energy involves pushing my limits just a little further without overexerting myself. A healthy diet and regular exercise nourish both body and mind, supporting this energy.

A - Apprehension

This is my biggest hurdle. At times, I find myself paralyzed, unable to pick up my pencil to create. Instead, I hesitate, often staring at a blank page for far too long before giving up. It’s frustrating, and I feel weak and cowardly for not pushing through.

Identifying the source of my apprehension is challenging. It stems from a myriad of issues: negative self-talk, overthinking, comparisons with others, and perfectionism. It’s a daunting struggle that can demoralize and prevent me from engaging in activities that would actually boost my confidence.

A kind reader once pointed out that I may suffer from imposter syndrome, something I was aware of but reluctant to admit. They shared inspiring stories and a quote that resonates with me: “You can either wait for creativity to flow or you can just start. Just do something.”

Proposed Solution:

Face what holds you back. For instance, I often feel misunderstood. Since my work reflects my unique perspectives, I anticipate it may not be well-received. I’m learning to embrace that possibility. What matters is creating something I’m proud of, regardless of others' judgments.

Are you a perfectionist? Accept that mistakes will happen; they signify growth. If you’re constantly comparing yourself to others, recognize that your individuality is what makes your creativity shine. And if you worry about others’ opinions, remember that most people are focused on their own lives. If your creativity brings you joy, that’s what’s important.

T - Time

I believe in a modern approach to productivity. I don’t subscribe to the traditional 8-hour workday or the relentless grind of type-A personalities. That lifestyle can lead to burnout, which isn’t sustainable for most.

As time passes, I realize I don’t want to be an older individual trying to make comics. My project demands significant time investment, and right now, time is precious.

After a recent trip back to Maine, I reflected on my relationship with time. I wanted to reconnect with my grandparents and spend quality moments with loved ones. The trip was enlightening and reaffirmed the importance of time in my life.

Proposed Solution:

I perceive time as an illusion, often inconsistent yet predictable. Time can feel like it speeds up or slows down based on our awareness. Instead of stressing about time, focus on living in the moment. Consider whether your relationship with time supports or hinders your goals.

Chapter 2: The Heart of Creativity

H - Heart

Above all, you must love what you create. I enjoy listening to comedians who possess self-awareness and infuse truth into their humor. Even if a comedian's material doesn’t resonate with me, their passion for comedy shines through.

When you love your craft, that passion will reflect in your work. It’s crucial to cherish the creative process and the potential of what you’re making.

I’ve struggled with my creative motivation, often enamored with potential rather than the reality of my projects. As I establish the primary aspects of my comic, I’m learning to focus on what it “will be” rather than what it “could be.”

Proposed Solution:

Ask yourself the difficult questions: Do I truly love this? I do. I love my story, characters, and the potential they hold. These elements matter to me, and without passion, nothing will get accomplished. If it’s something you love, pursue it. If not, perhaps it’s time to take a break and explore new avenues. Care for yourself and don’t lose hope.

Thank you for joining me on this journey. Remember, the barriers of D.E.A.T.H. shouldn’t intimidate you.

? Casey