Celebrating Trans Narratives: The Art of Unapologetic Expression
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Chapter 1: The Absence of Representation
As a child, I found myself surrounded by a glaring lack of transgender representation. Whenever I encountered transfeminine characters, they were often depicted as the subject of ridicule, overly sexualized, or victims of violence. These characters lacked depth and rarely appeared in more than a single episode or chapter before being killed off or disappearing entirely.
When it came to trans men, the situation was even bleaker.
In the British soap opera, Waterloo Road, there was a storyline featuring a trans guy that started when I was a young teenager. Unfortunately, the portrayal was clumsy and lacked understanding of trans experiences, focusing more on the concerns of cisgender parents rather than the trans character's autonomy. The character was sporty, a football player, and overly masculine, as if his transition was merely a means to participate in sports.
The film She’s The Man (2006) served as a poor inspiration for this narrative. It revolves around a girl masquerading as a boy to play soccer. Amanda Bynes, who starred in the film, has discussed her own feelings of gender dysphoria during the role, highlighting how trans roles are frequently played by cis actors, often to the detriment of authentic representation.
I remember watching She’s The Man and finding the humor unappealing. These narratives about trans men were not reflective of my life or feelings; instead, they were fantasies crafted by cisgender, heterosexual individuals. One story portrays a woman reverting from being a "pathetic" trans man to a desirable female, while another suggests a teenager transitions solely to escape misogyny.
The first video, Why trans and non-binary joy is not radical | Ben Pechey | TEDxLondonWomen, explores how joy in trans and non-binary identities is often dismissed as radical. It emphasizes the importance of celebrating these identities authentically.
I found far more joy in seeing effortlessly queer characters on screen. Figures like Hook and Smee from Hook (1991), or Armand and Albert in The Birdcage (1996), resonated with me. They were extravagant, loving, and unapologetically themselves. Even the flamboyant gay leather bikers from the Police Academy movies, though intended as comedic relief, showed men confidently expressing their love for one another.
Being transgender for me didn't mean aspiring to a conventional masculinity that society often imposes. I’m a stylish, pretty gay man with physical challenges that prevent me from engaging in sports, making the narratives of sporty trans men even more disconnected from my reality.
Section 1.1: Shifting Narratives
The fascination many cisgender people have with narratives surrounding trans masculinity often stems from their perspectives on which "women" should be deemed acceptable to transition. This viewpoint is tied to societal standards of female desirability and fails to extend genuine respect to men like me—those who defy conventional expectations.
Times have progressed somewhat; I see more trans men in media today. Animation, in particular, has made significant strides in featuring diverse trans characters. However, I still notice a predominance of nonbinary characters who fit a narrow mold, often portrayed as white and butch, serving mainly as an introduction to nonbinary identities for cis audiences.
Subsection 1.1.1: The Need for Diversity
The representation of nonbinary identities in popular media often defaults to a simplistic "woman-lite" narrative, lacking depth and variety. I can recall only a handful of notable trans men in television, especially those who are not white, skinny, or able-bodied.
Chapter 2: Crafting My Own Narratives
Having the freedom to create my characters as an indie author allows me to portray trans men authentically—characters who reflect the diversity of real-life experiences. I recently published my second novel featuring a transmasc fallen angel with complex traits, a character I could never have imagined during my childhood.
In the second video, What is Trans Joy? - Trans Positive Documentary, the film explores the essence of trans joy, emphasizing the importance of celebrating the fullness of transgender experiences.
There are no limits to the trans characters I can create. My stories include a range of identities—fat trans men, men of color, disabled men—each with their own unique narratives. The joy I feel when readers connect with my work, expressing how they see themselves in my characters, is immeasurable.
It's a lonely experience to navigate life as a transgender person, especially in a society that often punishes gender nonconformity. Awareness of the risks we face—ostracization, violence, and lack of acceptance—can weigh heavily on us. Yet, the connections we forge with those who understand and support us can provide solace and strength.
While I had the confidence to see myself reflected in the queer characters I admired, many others struggle with self-acceptance and visibility. They may stand before mirrors, unable to recognize themselves, feeling trapped in a potential yet to be realized.
The act of creating characters that resonate deeply with readers is a profound privilege. When someone tells me, "Finally, I feel seen," it brings an immense sense of joy and fulfillment.
In the words of Daniel Ortberg: "God blessed me by making me transsexual for the same reason God made wheat but not bread and fruit but not wine, so that humanity might share in the act of creation."
Being transgender has allowed me to create my identity and help others envision theirs. This journey of creation—of self and of stories—is a triumph that I cherish immensely.